The Dark Night of the Soul

March 2019

It’s happening to me and I’m terrified. It has really kicked in starting tonight and of course the coward in me went running to talk to someone.

I was never meant to reach them. I must walk through this alone. It’s very dangerous and I’m too far in to go back. And now the horrible place I was in only yesterday, seems ideal.

In order for a Just punishment to be effective on a liar who talks his way out of everything, it must utterly destroy the word of the liar. I will either come though the other side in Truth or I will receive the punishment for the liars who say one thing and do another. I am throwing my family into poverty and despair. Including the wife who loves me and saved me.

This was once presented to me as a thorny path. I told the Lord that I would choose it.

But I never did. The bill has come due.

May God have Mercy on my soul. And may I have the courage to give it to Him to destroy and
make better.